Getting Back To Normal

Heads up!

Am trying to get myself sorted ahead of what's going to be some week I think for myself!!

Get paid on Friday - hopefully get my new phone to replace my pride and joy iPhone - probably a Blackberry Bold 9780 - try and get professional now - hee hee!!!

Got a couple of night outs to get ready for - including my first date with a guy!!! His name is Jonathan - we met on Gaydar - and he's a few years older than me - hopefully he'll show me some tricks!!!

Have a good week!!!

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Apologies

Evening all,

Apologies for the lack of postings these past few months - I have been in a situation where I have been tweeting and twatting to such a extent that I have probably been putting more information on my life there than I have ever done here!

Saying that though there is I feel still a fundamental need for this blog so I can put down more pertinent and meaningful thoughts than some shitty 140 ramble - more 140 words full of incontinent bullshit.

The situation at home has not changed much - I am however on anti-depressants to try and curb my anxiety which has had rather surreal results - I was being very open with my postings on Facebook particularly over Christmas - which seems to have been due to the tablets - now however I am feeling extremely tired - which seems again to be down to these fuckers.

It is a work in progress - and it is rather depressing thinking that something like this has to involve green and yellow tablets which leave you in an utter state - however it has to be done in conjunction with my continuous working out at the gym.

Anyway enough for now,

B :)


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Couldn’t Decide!

…and no I didn’t get any of the coats – we’ve got a night out next weekend – so thought whilst Debenhams was having a sale – we’d get a nice shirt to go out in!

As for the coat – well that can wait, for now!

What a blast

Here we are again at the gym - in fact I'm currently in a loo having a dump.

Been a rather quiet last 24 hours or so with me - didn't get up to much last night - apart from the usual nonsense. Illegal downloading and watching 2 on 1 porn whilst jacking the jizz off Cheryl Cole. Lovely.

Anyway, back to reality - and I'm looking for a winter coat - in light of the forecasters saying that we might a blast from the pole in the coming week - no not that sort of blast - though that would be rather welcoming - nope our first potential snow of the winter. Seen one by Scotch and Soda but also one by Ringspun - really needs to be decided today this one.

Anyway I'm off to do my 60 minutes. Speak later.




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Shedding it.

I'm at the gym currently on the bike - with another 18 minutes or so of my session to go today.

Have lost a fair bit in the past few months - but am currently trying to shed as much as possible off my waist as is possible - haven't weighed myself purely in case I haven't lost as much as I think.

All about how I look in the end.


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The Fallout

Morning,

Well mother knows everything now - after a major row on Monday evening - since then she has barely spoken to me - which probably isn't a bad thing. The way I see things at the moment is that if people haven't got anything useful or relevant to say - to say absolutely fuck all.

No point in saying anything if all you're looking for is a row.

We've also had a setback of sorts in regards of moving out - my mate has decided to have a boob job - which will cost the GDP of Ireland as it stands right now, so can't afford that and the move out with me. However, the couple that we were looking to be moving in with are still very on for moving in with myself on my own - so we need to arrange a time to meet with them.

In a way - this might be a better option on the basis that moving into a house with a best mate could cause tensions whereas moving in with two other people means that isn't a issue.

As we were!


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Coming Out…

After keeping everything hidden in regards to my sexual preferences for so long – I’ve come out as bisexual.

It’s been up to now, quite a revealing process to myself – I originally came out to myself a good couple of months ago after a brief get-together with a girl at work, but I have known for more than a decade that I was very different to most other blokes in my peer group.  I wasn’t one who would go down the pub most nights – every penny I had would go on designer gear, particularly in the years after I left school – and I had a certain way of carrying it off – even with my substantial girth.

Originally, when I left school I was only interested in blokes and blokes alone – was continually wanking myself silly over random blokes till my late teens.

However, on a college course about eight years ago – I was introduced to this stunning girl called Marie, who lived in Dover – and I got the feeling that if she wasn’t already attached at the time that me and her would probably had got it on there and there – however like now, there was the feeling that I needed that little more – which is probably why I’ve never been able to find someone who satisfies my needs.

As time moved on – my sexuality has up to a point not really changed in that regard – what I would like to think however is that, now I have come out as what I am, that I can feel more confident and open in being bisexual and being able to find someone who can become that special person in my life.

The one aspect that I worried about was how were my family and friends were going to react – some of my very closest friends suspected for years that I wasn’t straight – and so wasn’t surprised in the slightest – others I think, although they haven’t said so probably feel uncomfortable – which is completely understandable – it took me over a decade to come out to myself.  Overall however, the support from everyone (even my own sister) has been wonderful and extremely heart-warming!

Here’s to the next chapter to my life.